Okay, so there's no way I'll actually be coherent enough to truly treat this like a pure anthropological study, but at least I'm not spittin' mad any more and thus am no longer worried my words may be sullied with excess vitriol. I won't get into the larger issues at stake here, but I figured I'd at least share some of the "examples of assitude" I alluded to in my earlier post. To avoid confusing labels (I can't keep saying "my friend" because this involves several of my friends), let's label the cast of characters thus:
C: the friend in question who is awesome and I love
M: C's boyfriend. Considerably less awesome.
A: has been friends with C since early childhood, I've known her and C since early high school. Highly opinionated with an extremely forceful personality.
B: friend of C from the same religion, has become friends with me and A over the past year or so
I: I just mean "I" as in the word you use instead of "me", maybe I should have gone with numbers...
Okay, so now that we instituted that either totally obvious or completely paranoid rubric, let's get on to the story.
Last Saturday (11/13/10) B had a birthday gathering that included all individuals in question. Over the course of the afternoon and early evening, M occasionally made comments that were distinctly tinged with bigotry, but the real fun didn't start until we all went out to dinner. B rode in the same car as M and C and apparently he bitched about A the whole way there. Now, I can understand being overwhelmed by her and/or not up to spending a lot of time in close proximity to such a whirlwind of energy if one is not used to it, but it's unclear exactly what she did to earn such animosity (we have a few theories...but those mostly have to do with her being a strong female and therefore a threat). The strangest element here is him doing it in front of B. Did he for some reason think she wouldn't tell us?
There were a whole spate of assitudinal moments at dinner, but we all avoided seriously starting shit given that it was B's birthday dinner. Prime examples include:
-M insisting that fried foods aren't bad for you, and when questioned by one of our other friends insisted that it was proved by 'science'. I missed this (I did a lot of going to the bathroom to avoid having to spend time in his proximity...also because I have a tiny bladder), but apparently he tried to bust out some sort of nonsensical explanation, clearly unaware that the woman to whom he was talking is a Cal grad who works in the microbio industry. Fail #1
-We were debating the possibility of genetic resistance to Poison Oak and A mentioned that she had Native American ancestry. M's response: "Oh, well that must mean you have the gene for alcoholism too". Um, yeah. I think I can just stop labeling the Fails here since this covers #'s 2-437.
-In a discussion that somehow involved the downsides of a stereotypical 1950's marriage (WHY WERE WE TALKING ABOUT THIS?!) he said something along the lines of "Well, you only don't want it to be that way when it benefits you. I'm sure there are a lot of aspects you do want." I don't remember if it was me or A, but one (maybe both) of us asked for an example. I was genuinely curious because there were a whole number of interesting sociological routes he could take, so what does he go with? He pointed directly at A and said "Well, I bet you like it when your boyfriend buys you lots of expensive things."
1) A runs a half-million dollar government program. She pays her own rent, she pays/has paid for her own tuition, she pays for her car. In fact, she makes quite a bit more money than her boyfriend, and really neither of them are into getting a whole bunch of unnecessary material shit for each other.
2) One of her personal pet peeves is women who predicate their relationship on having the man buy them lots of things.
3) In short: bitch got told, even though A's response was pretty much just telling him the above, with explanation of why #2 is a pet peeve (you know, relationships being based on respect and affection, etc. instead of material wealth...ridiculous shit like that). Again, it being B's birthday dinner, she kept it cordial.
-Then there was some whole thing where he bitched about tipping and splitting the bill to some insane degree (even though he wasn't the one paying: C was). This shit started up and I could tell it was going nowhere good so I put in my money and went to the bathroom. It was still going by the time I got back.
So, overall, M didn't make the most stellar of impressions that evening. However, given that this was only my second time meeting him, I didn't want to jump to a judgment too quickly. Okay, granted, I had already judged him and decided he was a judgmental bigoted dick, but I wanted to give him the benefit of the doubt and allow for the possibility that this wasn't true, that somehow there was some sort of explanation for him coming off as a total dick. I decided I needed to see him again before I really made up my mind.
Coming Soon: Part 2.11, The Cakewreck Icing on M's Gâteau of Fail
Be Seeing You.
Monday, November 22, 2010
Sunday, November 21, 2010
As If I Could Maintain a Consistent Narrative
Here's the deal: I'm in the midst of researching (and soon, I hope, will be writing) a term paper. I think it's going to propose that the American practice of embalming is indicative/tied to a modern trend of ignoring the dying process. Since we can't ignore death, we do our best to ignore how we get there. The paper is still in the early stages of development (read: I need to do SO MUCH MORE research), so the specifics of my thesis may change, but mostly I wanted to figure out some way to talk about (cosmetic) embalming because it's super weird.
Occasionally I realize that my obsession with death must be rather creepy when viewed from an outside perspective. Maybe someday I'll attempt to articulate my views. In the meantime, you can hang out with Dickinson and Yeats.
In addition to this, I'm attempting to learn a bunch of muscles in the human body (not, thank god, all 800 of them) as well as points of origin and insertion (shut up right now, don't even go there). I will undoubtedly immediately forget all this knowledge the moment I leave the final (here's hoping that doesn't happen BEFORE the final), but for now it's imperative I learn that shit.
My point being, my mind has not really been composed enough to continue Personal Lessons. I'll work at it in chunks, but can't promise any sort of regular updates for the next several weeks.
Be Seeing You.
Edit: And yes, I'm using time I don't have to write this. I'm a bit like a slacker Dalek Procrastinate...PROCRASTINATE
Occasionally I realize that my obsession with death must be rather creepy when viewed from an outside perspective. Maybe someday I'll attempt to articulate my views. In the meantime, you can hang out with Dickinson and Yeats.
In addition to this, I'm attempting to learn a bunch of muscles in the human body (not, thank god, all 800 of them) as well as points of origin and insertion (shut up right now, don't even go there). I will undoubtedly immediately forget all this knowledge the moment I leave the final (here's hoping that doesn't happen BEFORE the final), but for now it's imperative I learn that shit.
My point being, my mind has not really been composed enough to continue Personal Lessons. I'll work at it in chunks, but can't promise any sort of regular updates for the next several weeks.
Be Seeing You.
Edit: And yes, I'm using time I don't have to write this. I'm a bit like a slacker Dalek Procrastinate...PROCRASTINATE
Tuesday, November 16, 2010
Personal Lessons in Ethnography: Part 1.1
In a shocking turn of events, you will not be getting a fully fleshed Part 2 with any immediate alacrity. Part of this has to do with my uneasiness about sharing a delicate social situation that is still developing with the faceless menace of the Interwebs. I don't want my words to be twisted or misconstrued, particularly in any way that might adversely influence matters, so careful thought (always at a premium in my crazy brain) and precise elocution (yes I realize that's a debatable use of the word) are required. My previous post is a bit of a rant compared to the style in which I would prefer to present this. The struggle between my desire to view and share events in a detached, unbiased manner and the extremely strong feelings and opinions I have as a human being and a loving friend is what inspired the title of this multi-part story in the first place. It's one of the fundamental issues any rigorous anthropologist must confront. Since this is my personal blog and not a peer reviewed journal, I feel comfortable excusing myself from absolute unbiased assessment, but I think one of my greatest assets as a friend to the woman in question is my ability to employ logic and reason such that I am generally able to view an issue from multiple points of view.
Also, I'm lazy.
Be Seeing You.
Also, I'm lazy.
Be Seeing You.
Monday, November 15, 2010
An Interesting Personal Lesson in Ethnography: Part 1
As an anthropologist, I try to comprehend individuals from their own point of view, view situations with an impartial eye, and understand social constructs/societies without passing judgment. However, as a female and a human being, you can bet your ass I judge shit. I have exceedingly strong opinions, particularly when something or someone threatens me or mine. Particularly "mine". A threat to my person rarely upsets me as much as a threat against those I love.
My good friend is a member of a religion that, suffice to say I do not hold in high regard, not least because I believe it has had an extremely negative impact on her happiness and her life. However, she believes strongly in her faith, and I have to accept that. She's her own woman and though I don't necessarily agree, I respect her choice. This has brought me into close contact with a totally alien society that often goes against what my heart, mind, and gut tell me. I try not to interfere, but this shit just crossed the line.
To be fair, it's not the religion itself that's the issue so much as the situation it has created. In this parallel world, marriage and childbirth are completely central to a woman's place in the world. It seems an unmarried woman is regarded as worth less as a person, and though it's never explicitly stated (though in some cases, it's only just the other side of explicit) this knowledge permeates the life of every believer. By age 30, she's considered on the shelf.
It was a bit of a shock to me to find out that that concept still actually existed somewhere beyond my Regency romance novels. Srsly, guys? For reals? However, this constant denigration of the unmarried state is causing some serious issues in my friend's psyche since she is now pushing 27. It's become imperative to find a suitable partner. The catch is, he's got to be of the same religion. Now, my friend is awesome and incredibly artistically talented and open minded and intelligent: it's hard to believe that any man actually awesome enough for her wouldn't have left the church by now. In this culture that emphasizes conformity but lacks extreme mechanisms against personal defection, the pool of 'counter-culture' types is just not going to be very large. It was thus fairly exciting when my friend started dating a guy who might actually fulfill these criteria.
Unfortunately, this man is an utter ass.
In many ways he embodies the arrogance, the blindness, and the intolerance that I find so despicable in the religion as a whole.
In Part 2 we will discuss 1)Incidents of assitude/evidence for my admittedly harsh assessment of his character, 2)Why I consider him a direct threat to my friend's well-being, 3)The ways in which his personality and this situation might fit into the larger context of the religion as a whole, 4)No, seriously guys: what universe is this dude living in?
Be Seeing You.
My good friend is a member of a religion that, suffice to say I do not hold in high regard, not least because I believe it has had an extremely negative impact on her happiness and her life. However, she believes strongly in her faith, and I have to accept that. She's her own woman and though I don't necessarily agree, I respect her choice. This has brought me into close contact with a totally alien society that often goes against what my heart, mind, and gut tell me. I try not to interfere, but this shit just crossed the line.
To be fair, it's not the religion itself that's the issue so much as the situation it has created. In this parallel world, marriage and childbirth are completely central to a woman's place in the world. It seems an unmarried woman is regarded as worth less as a person, and though it's never explicitly stated (though in some cases, it's only just the other side of explicit) this knowledge permeates the life of every believer. By age 30, she's considered on the shelf.
It was a bit of a shock to me to find out that that concept still actually existed somewhere beyond my Regency romance novels. Srsly, guys? For reals? However, this constant denigration of the unmarried state is causing some serious issues in my friend's psyche since she is now pushing 27. It's become imperative to find a suitable partner. The catch is, he's got to be of the same religion. Now, my friend is awesome and incredibly artistically talented and open minded and intelligent: it's hard to believe that any man actually awesome enough for her wouldn't have left the church by now. In this culture that emphasizes conformity but lacks extreme mechanisms against personal defection, the pool of 'counter-culture' types is just not going to be very large. It was thus fairly exciting when my friend started dating a guy who might actually fulfill these criteria.
Unfortunately, this man is an utter ass.
In many ways he embodies the arrogance, the blindness, and the intolerance that I find so despicable in the religion as a whole.
In Part 2 we will discuss 1)Incidents of assitude/evidence for my admittedly harsh assessment of his character, 2)Why I consider him a direct threat to my friend's well-being, 3)The ways in which his personality and this situation might fit into the larger context of the religion as a whole, 4)No, seriously guys: what universe is this dude living in?
Be Seeing You.
Wednesday, November 3, 2010
I Wasn't Going to Bore You With This...
...but then I thought "well, shit: as long as I'm doing any sort of writing at all I might as well post it on my blog. Heh. I have a blog."
Also I initially posted it as a Facebox note, but I'm jumpy about drawing too much attention to my account and obviously this is the most genius thing ever and clearly the Interwebs will come flocking to my door, so I felt like I should put it in a forum that contains less DEEPLY PERSONAL information (btw, if I don't want the world to see it, I don't post it on the internet. However, I am also paranoid as shit). Thus, let us move on to:
"In the Torchwood: De-Classified television special that covers this episode, Burn Gorman jokingly remarks that Owen will transform into the "King of the Weevils" if he isn't truly dead."
What this quotation (which I got from somewhere, maybe Wikipedia...really I don't remember and thus REFUSE TO CITE it) doesn't say is that he actually uses the phrase "find his way into the sewers and become King of the Weevils" and then busts into maniacal laughter. It was a particularly quality moment and it got me thinking, "wait...as King of the Weevils, Owen would have the power and influence to distribute jumpsuits...". However, the Weevils are jumpsuited at the very beginning of the show, so obviously THAT can't be the answer.
Then it hit me.
Duh! The space-time rift runs through the city! Obviously somehow he travels back in time (maybe because the radiation in his body resonates with some wave coming out of the rift, and blah, blah technobabble which I'm totally able/willing to come up with if you want) and distributes jumpsuits THEN! "Why?" you may ask. Two possible explanations:
1) All the events portrayed in the show happened exactly the same way except it was an alternate reality where all the Weevils were actually naked. After a while as King, Owen gets tired of seeing nothing but (as Nichols so eloquently put it) "Weevil peen" and goes back in time on purpose to distribute jumpsuits so future him won't have to live (or, you know, whatever it is he does in place of living) with seeing all Weevil nudity ALL THE TIME.
2) Owen becomes King of the Weevils, then gets transported back in time, but the Weevils in the past are naked! Again, he's not real down with this for whatever reason (I refuse to speculate on that here), and institutes jumpsuit distribution. Thus, all future Weevils (including all the ones the future Torchwood team encounters) are jumpsuited.
Either way, he could use his knowledge of what was once "the past" to make shit-tonnes of money, enough to build his own jumpsuit factory with specific delivery to Weevils (maybe they have a big sewer grate in the middle of the factory floor and finished product gets thrown in there) which explains why they're all matching.
My theory seemed to hold up, even through Children of Earth. In preparation for writing this note I went online to find pictures of Weevils sporting jumpsuits. Oddly enough, there aren't really many good images of this out there and the best one I found (the one that's posted) doesn't come from Torchwood at all. In fact, it comes from Doctor Who and is most definitely not in Cardiff....so WHY ARE THESE WEEVILS CLOTHED?! If Weevils are indeed an alien species and not simply endemic to Cardiff (and I'd like to point out that we're never given any real reason why this should be the case), then my theory should only hold up for Cardiff Weevils unless that low grade telepathy the Torchwood team speculates on works over long distances and Weevils all across the world travel to Cardiff to obey the jumpsuit dictate of their King. Also, if I remember correctly, this is something like a few thousand years in the past, so either these are time-traveling Weevils or the jumpsuits came from someplace OTHER THAN EARTH. Maybe these are Weevils from future Cardiff, recruited by other more technically advanced alien races and they bummed a ride on someone's ship. Then it occurred to me: wait...why do the Weevils even care about the Doctor?
At this point in time I finally acknowledged I was putting entirely too much thought into this and decided to cut it out. Also because looking at that picture reminds me how much I can't wait for Series 6 to start up. In conclusion, I leave you with this:
Also I initially posted it as a Facebox note, but I'm jumpy about drawing too much attention to my account and obviously this is the most genius thing ever and clearly the Interwebs will come flocking to my door, so I felt like I should put it in a forum that contains less DEEPLY PERSONAL information (btw, if I don't want the world to see it, I don't post it on the internet. However, I am also paranoid as shit). Thus, let us move on to:
The Great Weevil Jumpsuit Conundrum Explained....Maybe
DISCLAIMER: If you haven't watched Torchwood but plan on doing so and don't like horrible spoilers, don't read this. If you haven't watched Torchwood and never plan on doing so, you also probably shouldn't bother reading this because you won't understand it and it'll probably bore the pants off of you. Basically, this all came about because of the wonder of Twitter. I tend to live-tweet (as if we could really dead-tweet anything) shows/movies I'm watching on my infoslab. Nichols pointed out that the real mystery of the Torchwood series is: why are Weevils all wearing matching jumpsuits?! He had a good point. Neither he, nor Julia, nor I could come up with a good explanation. No one ever questions it on the show and thus we never get a proper answer...
"In the Torchwood: De-Classified television special that covers this episode, Burn Gorman jokingly remarks that Owen will transform into the "King of the Weevils" if he isn't truly dead."
What this quotation (which I got from somewhere, maybe Wikipedia...really I don't remember and thus REFUSE TO CITE it) doesn't say is that he actually uses the phrase "find his way into the sewers and become King of the Weevils" and then busts into maniacal laughter. It was a particularly quality moment and it got me thinking, "wait...as King of the Weevils, Owen would have the power and influence to distribute jumpsuits...". However, the Weevils are jumpsuited at the very beginning of the show, so obviously THAT can't be the answer.
Then it hit me.
Duh! The space-time rift runs through the city! Obviously somehow he travels back in time (maybe because the radiation in his body resonates with some wave coming out of the rift, and blah, blah technobabble which I'm totally able/willing to come up with if you want) and distributes jumpsuits THEN! "Why?" you may ask. Two possible explanations:
1) All the events portrayed in the show happened exactly the same way except it was an alternate reality where all the Weevils were actually naked. After a while as King, Owen gets tired of seeing nothing but (as Nichols so eloquently put it) "Weevil peen" and goes back in time on purpose to distribute jumpsuits so future him won't have to live (or, you know, whatever it is he does in place of living) with seeing all Weevil nudity ALL THE TIME.
2) Owen becomes King of the Weevils, then gets transported back in time, but the Weevils in the past are naked! Again, he's not real down with this for whatever reason (I refuse to speculate on that here), and institutes jumpsuit distribution. Thus, all future Weevils (including all the ones the future Torchwood team encounters) are jumpsuited.
Either way, he could use his knowledge of what was once "the past" to make shit-tonnes of money, enough to build his own jumpsuit factory with specific delivery to Weevils (maybe they have a big sewer grate in the middle of the factory floor and finished product gets thrown in there) which explains why they're all matching.
My theory seemed to hold up, even through Children of Earth. In preparation for writing this note I went online to find pictures of Weevils sporting jumpsuits. Oddly enough, there aren't really many good images of this out there and the best one I found (the one that's posted) doesn't come from Torchwood at all. In fact, it comes from Doctor Who and is most definitely not in Cardiff....so WHY ARE THESE WEEVILS CLOTHED?! If Weevils are indeed an alien species and not simply endemic to Cardiff (and I'd like to point out that we're never given any real reason why this should be the case), then my theory should only hold up for Cardiff Weevils unless that low grade telepathy the Torchwood team speculates on works over long distances and Weevils all across the world travel to Cardiff to obey the jumpsuit dictate of their King. Also, if I remember correctly, this is something like a few thousand years in the past, so either these are time-traveling Weevils or the jumpsuits came from someplace OTHER THAN EARTH. Maybe these are Weevils from future Cardiff, recruited by other more technically advanced alien races and they bummed a ride on someone's ship. Then it occurred to me: wait...why do the Weevils even care about the Doctor?
At this point in time I finally acknowledged I was putting entirely too much thought into this and decided to cut it out. Also because looking at that picture reminds me how much I can't wait for Series 6 to start up. In conclusion, I leave you with this:
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